What Is Biblical Marriage? Foundations, Definition, and Principles

hands of man and woman on wedding day , biblical marriage blog post header image

What is marriage?

It’s a question the Bible holds the keys to because God created marriage and revealed it in Scripture.

book cover of Christian Marriage: A Comprehensive Introduction by David J. Ayers

Given the confusion in our culture and in our churches, agreeing upon the basic meaning of marriage is no longer a “given.” The very definition of marriage is of utmost concern. A clear definition of terms is needed. As David J. Ayers begins in Christian Marriage: A Comprehensive Introduction, “If you try to talk about something but you cannot clearly define it, you literally ‘don’t know what you are talking about’!”

To elaborate on a robust Christian understanding of marriage, Ayers begins with some biblical foundations from which he derives essential principles to build a definition.

Biblical foundations of marriage

Genesis 2:18–24 is the foundational passage in Scripture about marriage. God created and officiated marriage for his unfallen creation, and “the root of our understanding of marriage is that, in it, the husband and wife become one flesh” (p. 18). This passage is considered foundational for the scriptural authors, such as Jesus (Matt 19:4–6) and Paul (Eph 5:28–32).

Marriages in which God himself is both matchmaker and minister bookend the Bible (Gen 2:18–24; Rev 19:9; 21:2–3). Jesus used a Jewish wedding as the occasion to perform his first miracle (John 2:1–11). The simple vessel of covenant marriage, created before Adam’s fall that led to our need for redemption, reveals and symbolizes to us the mysteries of the gospel and of Christ’s relationship with his covenant people (Eph 5:32). Both Isaiah (54:5–6) and Hosea (2:16–20) described the redemptive relationship of God to his people as like a husband to his wife, pointing forward to Christ. Clearly marriage, especially Christian marriage, is a “canvas upon which the Holy Spirit of God paints the gospel.” Like a geode—on the outside nothing more than a potato-like stone—inside God has filled marriage with mystery and wonder.

Free Bible Software. Priceless Insights. clickable image

Moreover, Scripture tells us that the simple blessings of godly marriage are among the richest gifts we can receive from God, more than money, fame, or power. David describes God’s reward for the man who fears the Lord: “Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your children will be like olive shoots around your table” (Ps 128:3). In one of the most gorgeous passages in Ecclesiastes (9:9), we find this heartfelt recommendation: “Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life that he has given you under the sun, because that is your portion in life and in your toil at which you toil under the sun.” (p. 2)

Essential principles of marriage

Drawing from Scripture and tradition, Ayers makes these assertions about marriage:

  1. Marriage is ordained and ordered by God.
  2. Marriage is a contract and a covenant.
  3. Marriage is both religious and civil.
  4. Marriage is both private and public.
  5. Marriage requires mutual consent.
  6. Marriage is for all types of people.
  7. Marriage is heterosexual and monogamous.
  8. Marriage cannot be between close family relations.
  9. Marriage is for life.
  10. Marriage is a sexual union.
  11. Marriage is sacred but not a sacrament.

A definition of biblical marriage

After providing the foundations and elaborating on essential principles, Ayers concludes with his working definition for marriage:

Marriage is an irreplaceable and core institution of human society, created by God before the fall of Adam and Eve, which communicates deep spiritual truth, including speaking to the human race about the relationship of God to his people, pointing to the marriage between Christ and his Church at the end of history. In it, one man and one woman, who are not restrained by conditions that would invalidate their union, and who are fully informed in all relevant matters, freely and publicly enter into the marital covenant, through solemn vows, to accept and fulfill all the obligations of marriage, including an exclusive sexual relationship, for all the days in which both live. They consummate these vows through sexual intercourse. (p. 37)

***

This article is excerpted from David J. Ayers’ Christian Marriage: A Comprehensive Introduction (Lexham Press: 2019).

What the Song of Solomon Reveals about God’s Design for Marriage
Sexual Purity: What Scripture Teaches about God’s Plan for Sex

  • Understanding & Living With Sexual Integrity and Do This/Not That (Course) – Stephen Arterburn’s Every Man’s Battle and the Life Recovery Bible have helped countless people and families. These video courses bring much of the same encouragement.
  • Biblical sexual ethics – In this six-hour course, Dr. David Instone-Brewer takes a closer look at how marriage, divorce, polygamy, homosexuality, and other topics are addressed in the Bible by unpacking the text of Scripture and the context in which that Scripture was written.
  • Counseling Marriage & Family (Course) – If you’re a counselor, Dr. Dan Zink will take you through some of the toughest issues in marriage counseling and working with families.
Christian Marriage

Christian Marriage

Regular price: $7.49

Add to cart
The Gospel & Marriage

The Gospel & Marriage

Regular price:

Add to cart
Marriage Is: How Marriage Transforms Society and Cultivates Human Flourishing

Marriage Is: How Marriage Transforms Society and Cultivates Human Flourishing

Regular price: $4.99

Add to cart
Marriage: Biblical and Theological Aspects

Marriage: Biblical and Theological Aspects

Regular price:

Add to cart
Mobile Ed: PD161 Understanding and Living with Sexual Integrity (4 hour course)

Mobile Ed: PD161 Understanding and Living with Sexual Integrity (4 hour course)

Regular price: $149.99

Add to cart
Mobile Ed: PD151 Do This Not That to Transform Your Marriage (4 hour course)

Mobile Ed: PD151 Do This Not That to Transform Your Marriage (4 hour course)

Regular price: $149.99

Add to cart
Mobile Ed: BI390 Biblical Sexual Ethics (6 hour course)

Mobile Ed: BI390 Biblical Sexual Ethics (6 hour course)

Regular price: $219.99

Add to cart
Mobile Ed: CO201 Counseling for Marriages and Family (5 hour course)

Mobile Ed: CO201 Counseling for Marriages and Family (5 hour course)

Regular price: $189.99

Add to cart

Free Bible Software. Priceless Insights. clickable image

 

Share
Written by
Jake Mailhot

Jake Mailhot is the product manager for Lexham Press. He also writes about baseball and lives in Bellingham, WA.

View all articles

Your email address has been added

Written by Jake Mailhot
All Deals Live: Save up to 60% on March Matchups commentaries and more.
This is default text for notification bar